May 21, 2012: How babies are made

Gavin and I had our first conversation about boners on Friday, an important moment in any mama's life. He was standing at the toilet, "waiting for the pee to come," and I was supervising and encouraging us both to "listen for the pee" (I find this to be very helpful as it makes Gavin focus on the task at hand. It is much easier to pee when you're not distracted, especially when the whole toilet thing is new to you). He was holding his penis when he looked at me and said, "I have a bone in my penis." And I thought to myself, "Huh. So this is happening." I'm pretty sure I responded with, "You do? What makes you say that?" Perhaps detecting my skepticism he asked, "I do have a bone in my penis?" And I explained that, no, he had veins in his penis that filled with blood and that made it feel like he had a bone in his penis. He seemed satisfied by this and shortly after that he peed, got a jelly bean, and moved on to other things. Which is good, because I'm going to have to brush up on WebMD before we take this conversation into territory that is even slightly more complicated.

The following conversation happened between Stacy and Gavin on Saturday morning (this was transcribed by Stacy. I was asleep and missed it all):

Mommy: When you're big, you'll have to drink skim milk, like me.
Gavin: When I'm big I'm gonna have kids.
M: You're going to be a papa?
G: Yeah.
M: You should wait until you have someone you love to do it with. Raising kids is hard.
G: With you.
M: When you're a papa, I'll be the grandma.
G: No, the mommy.
M: I'll be the mommy?
G: And I'll have two kids. A boy and a girl.
M: What will you call them?
G: John. And Harwey.
M: Harley?
G: No. Harwey. No! The girl name Juju.
M: And when you have kids, what will you do?
G: Play with them. And dress them.

I think Gavin would make a good papa. I mean, not right now. Right now he would definitely have the child taken away child protective services because he would likely leave him or her in the yard overnight like he did the battery pack to his power tool toys. Or let him or her sit in a soiled diaper while he watched Cars en español. Bottom line: you really can't trust an almost three-year-old with a baby. (Free parenting tips from Mama D!) I do think that Gavin would make a great older brother and it is sad that he will not have that experience. But having another child just because you want your first child to have a sibling doesn't really make sense. But my boy is a lucky boy and he has a really good life if I do say so myself. And I do.