Week 6 Day 5: Gavin the kid

Today we were supposed to go to my dad's house so Gavin could hang with his Grandpa Mike and Aunt Amanda. Unfortunately, my dad had to bail on us. And so we went nowhere instead. And I guess you could say we went nowhere fast because today really did seem to go by quickly. At first. The last half hour was long. Pacing around the house with my giant child in my arms, both of us wanting Stacy to be home very badly. Sometimes it's like that. Shift's over, your turn, I'm going to go to the titty bar. Just kidding. Gavin is obviously the only one headed there. As for me, I don't even know that I've spelled "titty" correctly because who even writes that? That's a word for saying. And not actually a word I say. I prefer the much more respectable "hooters." "Hoots" for short.

I watched Billy the Kid today (while Gavin took his nap. I wasn't ignoring my son. I only do that to play Farmville), a documentary about a 15-year-old kid. He has aspergers but the film never mentions it. It's really obvious though. In any case, I got it from the library because I knew it had played at either the Detroit Film Theater or the Main/Maple Art and that it was about a teenage boy. Seeing as I will have me one of those in, oh, less than 13 years, I figured it couldn't hurt to watch it. I didn't know anything about the subject of the film, Billy, besides that he was 15 and didn't fit in. Anyway, I really loved the movie. And I think being a mom is a really big part of that. Before I had a son of my own I would have liked this movie, too. But watching it while my son slept in the next room definitely shaped how it impacted me. I felt very maternal towards Billy. And the relationship between Billy and his mom was really touching. She clearly loved her son so much and wanted so badly to protect him but to also trust him to be his own person and to grow up. I cried. More than once. Thinking about it now I'm getting choked up. The trailer gives you a good idea about the film. But you should really just see it.

Teenage boys have always been a mystery to me. Aside from the handful that I had as friends in high school, most teenage boys seemed like big dogs who could talk and drive cars. And some of those dogs were mean. Since I didn't exactly have "feminine wiles" to use in my favor I always felt uneasy around them. They weren't boyfriends and they were seldom friends. I didn't want to kiss them, but I also didn't have a lot in common with them. So. It wasn't until I started teaching, really, that I started to like teenage boys. Teaching freshman comp my first year I found myself getting mom crushes on some of my male students. And by mom crushes I don't mean anything cougar related. This was strictly maternal. Like I wanted to give them a ride to practice and make them a sandwich. This rapidly accelerated when I knew that I had a son on the way. In any case, teenage boys as subjects is very interesting to me. One of the best books I've read has been 10th Grade by Joseph Weisberg. In fact, I wish I owned it so I could read it right now. I'm going to seek it out and read it again.

It's hard to believe that Gavin will one day be a big dog who can talk and drive a car. Or a hoverboard. Or whatever he'll have in his crazy future. Right now he is a little bear with two teeth who doesn't like to eat peas. And I am madly in love with him. Which means eventually, for the first time in my life, I'll be madly in love with a teenage boy. Weird.

So it's been six weeks of Baby Bear Care and Amanda recommended a report card. The first two categories and grades are hers. The rest are mine.

Six Week Report Card
Keeping the Kid Alive: A++
Feeding the Baby Bear Peas: C
Leaving the House: C+
Putting him down for naps: B
Patience: B-
Hugs and Kisses: A
Making Baby Laugh: A
Dance Routines and Singing: B+
Getting Showered and Dressed: C+
Photo and Video Documentation*: A
Keeping Baby Occupied and Happy: B
Keeping Self Occupied and Happy: B

I'm a hard grader, I think. But it's hard to grade yourself. I'm probably being too hard on myself in some areas (Dance Routines and Singing) and too easy in others (Patience). And I'm sure there are a zillion more categories I could come up with, but I need to go to bed. This full time mom stuff is exhausting.

*I'm talking about photos and videos of Gavin, not of me getting showered and dressed, lest the order of the list cause any confusion. No photos or videos of me getting showered and dressed exist and that is for the best.